- F. Scott Fitzgerald (via itsmicca)
Hello small but beautiful number of followers.
I love you.
And I’m not doing so great right now.
And I could use a hug or a hi or a random anonymous story about you to take my mind off of it.
Anything at all really.
Just feeling so much shame, guilt, worthlessness, pain, sadness, lost, emptiness, numb and sometimes, anger.
Isn’t it just sad that how we can the number of emotions felt by our fingers.
What’s sadder is that we all know these emotions far too well, far too much for our own good.
That’s all I’m capable of feeling and this just proves nothing but the fact that I’m not functioning very well as a general human being.
I know this wayy too well, I hope you’re doing okay
So you know how in every movie and every situation in life, there’s always someone telling you to ‘let your hair down! Do what you want to do, be spontaneous and think of yourself!’ I think I may have taken that a bit too far.
I’ve gotten so self centered that I’ve lost my awareness to the world around me. I have the worst impulse control of anyone I know and I do shitty things because of it, but rarely care. I’ve endangered myself and hurt others on countless occasions, and I know that’s not the person I want to be deep down.
I just don’t know how to be motivated again when all I really want is for everything to end. I’m sick of chasing highs and doing stupid shit to satisfy my masochistic agenda. I’m sick of all of it, but I don’t even have the little bit of control I used to. I don’t know what to do anymore.